It fits.


Can you remember when there was no such thing as a “meme”? When nothing was ever “pinned” or “posted”? When you had to actually doodle stuff on books and paper? Lol I do!
But now I have entire “boards” full of memes. After awhile they all seem to look the same, you see the same ones time and time again.
However, every now and then you come across one that just fits you perfectly. (See above).
Have a happy Saturday everyone! 

Scary, Fun, Whacky, Crazy, Clutzy, Uniquely, but never sorry, Joy!


I am sooooooo not perfect, not anywhere NEAR it. This is who I am and this is how God made me. I struggled with my identity for most of my life, I think that is partly because as a teen and young adult i was involved in the runway/print/pageant industries and I started off with some pretty messed up ideas of what a woman should look and feel like.  There are a lot of HIGHS and LOWS involving your self-esteem in those industries. For a long time I worried too much about trying to impress others.  I pretended to like things I didn’t necessarily like, I pretended to be a girl that everyone would like. That has all stopped.

So here I am in my early 40’s and FINALLY, I have figured out who I am, and accepted the woman who I have become.

I’m about to share a few facts about me (this is your opportunity to duck out if your not interested in knowing) :)

  • I am not graceful in any way shape or form, in fact I’m very much like a bull in a china shop. I will likely trip over my own two feet, lose my balance, knock something over, break something, bump into something or someone, and possibly take them and/or myself down in the process.
    No Grace, none at all.
  • Sometimes, I am shy and quiet, especially when meeting people for the first time, but once I get to know you, you will probably see the loud, obnoxious side of me, you may wish you hadn’t gotten to know me.
  • I laugh a lot! Sometimes, so hard I can barely catch my breath, and sometimes I cry over random things, like a Wal-Mart commercial at Christmas time, or a photo I see posted on Instagram, or even a song on the radio.  I am intensely emotional, but not ashamed to be that way.  I would rather feel EVERYTHING so hard that it stings and hurts than to feel nothing at all. Sometimes, if something really, REALLY upsets me, I get angry, REALLY ANGRY, but luckily I also get over it pretty quickly. For me, anger doesn’t happen often, and it usually involves someone lying, the one thing I simply can not tolerate.
  • I read like its my JOB.  I can’t read enough, I am in the library 2-3 times a week.  I like ACTUAL books, not digital books. I like the smell of book paper the feel of it between your fingers, the anticipation of turning the page.  I prefer fiction, mostly because I know that most fiction, is possible and most scenarios have actually happened to SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE.  Fiction is therefore, in my opinion, actually, mostly…non-fiction.
  • I am fiercely loyal, often defensive, and sometimes confrontational. I’m VERY PASSIONATE about things and people who are important to me.
  • I’m obsessive compulsive. Visually, things need to look a certain way to me.  Lined up a certain way, organized, color coordinated, in groups of three, vacuum lines in the carpeting….just weird.
  • I like my music loud, and I sing in the shower, and in the car….not well mind you! Not well at all.  But the volume drowns out my own voice so I don’t assault myself.
  • You are more likely to find me in yoga pants and running shoes OR leggings and Chuck Taylors than anything else, but I do occasionally wear heels because I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE them, so I try to balance my clumsy self for a day from time to time. (I actually broke my ankle once disembarking from a cruise ship in a pair of high wedged sandals, just to give you an idea of my coordination, or lack thereof). 
  • I live everyday of my life with a potentially fatal disease called AQUIRED APLASTIC ANEMIA, I do not allow this disease to run my life. I have an incredible team of dedicated doctors who are keeping my disease at bay and managed. I am eligible to receive a full medical disability, I could quit my job, and sit around on my butt all day doing nothing but watching TV and applying for assistance programs and handicapped parking placards. The mere IDEA of that makes me want to vomit.  I’m perfectly capable of working my AWESOME job that I love…so why would I consider any of those options?  I will consider them only when and IF my disease ever progresses to the point where it is no longer manageable.
  • I like video games.  Old School Nintendo stuff like Legend of Zelda and Mario.  More updated on the WiiU now, but I still play the old 8-bit stuff every now and then!
  • I have ZERO tattoos.
  • I love to drive around with all of my windows down and the wind blowing my hair.  I often arrive places disheveled and with messy hair.  I stop at red lights and see other women sitting in their cars with the windows up and every hair perfectly in place, and I wonder what it must be like to always be pulled together like that.
  • I LOVE THE SUN! Sunny days are the best!  I don’t care for heat, I’m much more of a spring/autumn person, but no matter what the temperature is, SUN DOES IT FOR ME EVERY TIME! I love the burst of energy that I get from the vitamin D pouring over me! I just can never get enough!
  • I am a beginner hiker. I enjoy hiking through my local trails and woods.  I can’t hike alone because of my disease but I enjoy hiking with others anyway. I love nature!
  • I think I am blessed with the gift of the ability to see beauty in everything. And I really do mean everything!  I have been known to pull over on the side of the road and get out of the car to take photographs of a telephone pole that I think just looks interesting.  Everyday, all day, I see things, places and people, that stun me with their sheer beauty
  • I’m a mom of a 16-year-old son. Every single day, the first thing that I thank God for, is the opportunity to have been entrusted with this blessing,  After 16 years, I’m still in awe of this amazing gift.
  • I don’t have the perfect body, I have more than a few grey hairs popping out and I’m starting to see the beginnings of crows feet on the sides of my eyes.  This is who I am, and I am totally okay with it.  I intend to age gracefully (see! there IS one thing I can be graceful about!) I would never even consider Botox or surgery AKA poison and needless cutting. I do however COLOR MY HAIR! I always have and I always will!

 That’s the sum of pretty much WHO I AM.  You may actually know too much about me now, WAAAAAAY more than you probably wanted to know.  But if you stuck it out with this post until it’s very, bordering on narcissistic, end, I applaud you! Some people will adore me, and others won’t stand me. Either way I don’t care, I THINK I AM COMPLETELY AND TOTALLY AWESOME.

Testing Trust


It’s no secret, I’ve said it before….I don’t trust people. I’ve touched on this briefly in other posts.

Sadly, I allowed ONE person’s untrustworthiness to destroy my trust in pretty much everyone.

Does that make me sad and pathetic?  Perhaps.

Do I want to stay this way? Absolutely not.

But how do I get out? How do YOU get out if you are going through this as well?

I’m certainly no expert.  But I am willing to share MY experience in the hope that my words can be a comfort to someone else who has found themselves in a similar situation.

Continue reading

Pink Sock Monkey Hat



Crochet Sock Monkey Hat Pattern

(the colors listed below are for a standard RED sock monkey hat, I changed the colors for the pink version)

Pattern by Sarah Zimmerman
Yarn:White or Ivory
Red: Vanna’s Choice – Cranberry
Grey: Vanna’s Choice – Grey Marble
Size H (5.0mm) hook-
Tapestry Needle-
Two medium size buttons for eyes
(I found that Vanna’s Choice “Barley”, and Loops & Threads™ Impeccable™ Yarn in “Aran”(cream color) is a better match to an actually sock monkey.)

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Mascara, Lipstick, Eyeshadow? On a girl like me?

I haven’t worn eyeshadow in years.

In fact, for many years i didn’t wear any makeup at all.  I was a busy girl, a tomboy type girl really, and a mom; working full time in a career that basically kept me behind a computer in a dark cave like room for the majority of the time.

I didn’t need to impress anyone. I still don’t.

BUT…in the last few years I have slowly snuck makeup back into my daily routine.

It started with lip gloss.  shiny moist lips were so much better then dry, dull ones. Then, eyeliner.

It occurred to me that use of eyeliner made my eyes appear a little bit “brighter”.

For a long time that was it, just lip gloss and eyeliner.

Then, pinterest came along.  Now I find myself obsessed with makeup and nail polish tutorials.

I don’t love lipstick, but I do have a tube of it, as well as a lip liner. I prefer a natural shade.

 I use “Spice” lip pencil and “Twig lipstick.  Now I actually only use lipstick every now and then.

Mostly I still use JUST lip gloss.  That choice is CO Bigelow Mentha-shine.

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Chocolate Cake is HEAVEN…


5 years ago, my mother-in-law Ruth bought me a Kitchen Aid Stand Mixer for Christmas.  For four years it has collected dust.


Then, I started using it, just this past June.  I’ve used it more times since June then i have in the whole 4 years prior!

Chocolate cake is HANDS DOWN my favorite thing to make.  I’ve made this cake several times and always gotten RAVE REVIEWS!  One person said it was the best cake she’d ever eaten and that she was totally serious.  Another friend said that it was better than the expensive gourmet cupcakes I had purchased from FLAVOR cupcakery (a local cupcake shoppe famous for winning CUPCAKE WARS on the Food network).

The recipe I use is the one on the side of the Hershey’s Cocoa Powder Can.

Here it is:

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Going No-Poo AKA Shampoo Free



A couple weeks ago I decided to go shampoo FREE aka “NO-POO” after learning that my favorite shampoo (Wen) was actually full of chemicals.
I came across some disturbing info about Wen while looking at hair ideas on Pinterest one night.  I did some research and soon learned that Wen doesn’t list all of the ingredients on the label, they only list the “KEY INGREDIENTS”.  They also refuse to give a full list of ingredients if you ask for one. (I asked for one and was told that they “do not have any information to provide to the public in respinse to this request”)  I was disheartened.

So, I did MORE research, and checked out a lot of information about the natural “NO SHAMPOO” method that is bringing smiles and healthy locks to women everywhere.  I decided that I HAD to try it, naturally! lol

The first few days were the worst. Continue reading

402 Followers. I appreciate you all. : )

Wow 402 people actually read my drivel.

LOL! The truth is….I’m honored that you each read what I have to say. REALLY truly honored.

Some people have messaged me asking me to get a little more personal on this blog like I was on my BBM channel before this, so I am going to try a different approach!

Hope you all like whats coming!

Please continue to share the site and COMMENT!!!

Thanks so much!

To green, or not to green…

I’m on a Green Smoothie “kick”!
I decided to give these odd sounding smoothies a try when I was fasting from solid foods and only consuming liquids.  My fast was for 21 days and I knew my body couldn’t handle the lack of basic nutrition for that long,  especially being under a doctors care for a serious health condition. 

So….I did a little research. 
The next thing I knew I was at the grocer’s picking up this:

image Continue reading